


HighStuck

by The_Shipper_Of_Heart



Series: HIghStuck [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Childhood Friends, Drama, F/M, Friendship, High School, Humanstuck, Middle School, Other, all those cliches, backstabbing, relationships, too many characters to list - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-15
Updated: 2017-02-07
Packaged: 2018-09-17 15:07:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9330758
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/The_Shipper_Of_Heart/pseuds/The_Shipper_Of_Heart
Summary: Equius Zahhak had a childhood friend when he was little that moved away. Years later, this friend would end up saving him after he overhears a prank that is going to be played on him. He becomes cold and distant from many of his classmates. A couples years later, in high school, he is still the same way. Then, a new girl moves into town and flips his life. He still holds onto the thought of going to find the childhood friend he made, but maybe Nepeta will help him out of his shell, and maybe he'll help her overcome her insecurities.





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Originally posted on Fanfiction.net Slowly moving things from there to here, while i may still post to both sites.

Equius Zahhak walked down the hallways of his middle school. He couldn’t be happier. He had finally worked up enough courage to ask his crush, Aradia Megido out. But before he could, she caught him off guard and asked HIM out. Just as he was turning the corner, he saw Aradia talking to Vriska Serket. Equius wasn’t exactly friends with Vriska, but he didn’t want to be rude and interrupt. He heard his name mentioned, so he stayed behind the corner to listen in.

“You all set for tonight?” Vriska asked. “I need to hear the plan again.”

. Aradia giggled a bit. “Well I asked Equius to meet me at the location I told you about. He will be in for SUCH a surprise.”

“Yeah?” Serket smirked “Then what?”

“I’m going to make him wait a long time. Then when I see he’s about to leave, Sollux and I will walk out in plain view and just start making out. Once he sees, he’ll be frozen in disbelief. That’s when you come out and whack him with this.” Aradia pulled out a magic eight ball and handed it to her friend.

Vriska turned the ball over and over in her hands. “Such a shame I’ll have to waste a perfectly good 8 ball on that loser.” The two laughed and walked off, talking about Equius.

“He’s such a loser.” Aradia said. “Thinking I’D actually ask him out.”

 

“Who’d ever like him?” Vriska added. “He wears that dorky cat hat all the time. Such a wimp.”

Equius just stood there frozen. He..he thought Aradia actually liked him and not that nerdy douchebag Sollux. He shook a bit as a tear rolled down his face. He didn’t notice the class stoner, Gamzee Makara, walk up behind him.

“Equius bro, you...okay?” Gamzee asked. He could tell Equius was upset. What Zahhak did next caught him off guard.

“ GET LOST, YOU..YOU CLOWN OBSESSED STONER!” Equius roared at him. 

“honk…?”

Equius pushed Gamzee, quite roughly, out of his way as he tore down the hall in a sprint. How could he have been such a fool? He was a loser, that’s all he’d ever be. He wanted to get away. He wanted a friend for once. Gamzee didn’t count really. Makara was friends with just about everyone.

Equius climbed the ladder to the school’s roof and sat there, overlooking the town. He brought his knees close to him and just sat there, a few tears escaping his eyes. He sighed and took off the hat, turning it over in his hands. Everyone made fun of him for wearing such a “dorky” hat. The hat was his favorite color, blue, and made to look like a cat.

This was the only thing that made the teenager smile. Nobody knew why he wore that hat. Nobody except him, his brother, and his father. This hat was special to him. He wore it every day to know there was good in the world.

He wore it to remember

Her...


	2. Chapter 1

*4 years later*

Equius Zahhak, now a high school junior, walked the hallway to his locker. He had changed a lot since middle school. He was buffer, he was taller, and his hair was slightly longer. He now wore a dark green jacket as well. The only thing that hadn’t changed about him was the blue hat he wore. He didn’t care what anybody said about it. It was important to him and he would never remove it for anyone. 

On his way to his destination, he passed a group of students, which included Sollux and Aradia. Sollux whispered something and the girls began to giggle, looking at Equius. He knew it was about him, because when he turned and gave them a death stare, they all stopped simultaneously. Equius punched the nearest locker, smashing the door and caving it in. He walked on as the group stared at him. “That’s the tenth locker he’s broken this week.” Sollux whispered. 

In class, Equius stared out the window, twirling a lock of hair with his pencil. He was interested in the class, but today he was in an off mood. He already had the information the teacher was putting on the board. He was free to put his mind elsewhere. He was watching a cloud go by as the classroom door opened. Equius glanced over and saw a girl poke her head in. The teacher seemed to have been expecting her, since she motioned her in. Equius studied her. She was short with long caramel hair and sunglasses that covered her eyes. She moved them up so they rested on top of her head. 

Equius listened in and out of what the teacher was saying. Something about the girl's name being Nepeta Leijon and just moving here from some place or another. It was odd to him how a student could start partway through the semester. But, he didn't make the rules. It was also odd that a high school teacher would introduce a new student instead of letting them find their way in the herd and just point out they transferred. But, Ms LaLonde was different. She was sort of teacher that looked out for all her students, not just her daughters that just happened to be in the class.

The teacher briefly left to the hall, leaving the fresh meat of the student to the class. Equius knew she needed a seat. He hoped to himself she wouldn't take the empty seat right next to him. There were other good seats in the class. It was almost a silent rule among students- Don't sit near Equius Zahhak. 

Nepeta seemed to have other plans as she made her way down the aisle towards the empty seat. The class’s blind girl, Terezi Pyrope, stopped her with her cane. “you do not wanna sit there,” she warned the new girl. “that’s Equius. He isn’t that friendly.”

Equius muttered and looked back to the window. He heard a chair scrape the floor, the sound of some stuff hitting his desk, and another chair-to-floor scrape. He looked over and saw Nepeta sitting in the empty spot next to him. He turned his attention to the window once more. He had to admit, she was pretty brave. 

Before the girl could talk to him, he held up a hand to interrupt her, still turned away. “First off,” he said. “Don’t talk to me. Second,” he drew a line on the desk with his finger. "never cross this line. Got it?”

His response was silence, followed by a small sound. He glanced over and saw she was giggling. He didn’t like this. She was one of them. Someone who didn’t take him seriously. Someone who’d mock him. “I’m serious!” He growled, holding up a fist. The whole class was looking now. “You don’t know what I’m capable of!”

The girl said nothing and still giggled a bit. “whaaate-fur.” she said, smiling. She opened up a small book and started to scribble something in it. Equius blinked. Did..did she just use a cat pun? Her head wasn’t turned to him anymore, but something on her face caught his eye.

She had a small scar on the middle of her upper lip that went up about a quarter inch or so, her mouth was shaped almost like a cat’s. Was she that obsessed with cats? He studied her more and noticed she had blue fingerless gloves with what looked to be long, fake claws glued on. He looked to the back of her chair and saw a blue tail hanging off it, most likely attached to her belt. He inferred she was trying to dress like a cat.

Cats...He touched his hat. Could she..no. That girl was most likely long gone by now, probably on the other side of the world for all he knew. If they had been old enough, they could have stayed in touch by Pesterchum. But of course, they were too young at the time. He could have given her his address,so they could write one another and try to meet again. 

If only…

As Nepeta drew in her book, Terezi poked her with her cane and motioned the girl to come close. The two leaned forward closer as the blind girl whispered.

“don’t worry...he doesn’t hit girls.”

Nepeta nodded and turned back to her drawing. As she turned her head, she noticed the boy that sat next to Terezi. He looked almost as grumpy as the boy next to her. He wore a gray sweater and had messy copper hair. He was pretty cute. Could he be..? No. The one she was thinking of had black hair.

Just like the guy sitting next to her...what was his name? The girl with the red glasses had called him..Equius was it? Oh well. She’d find out later. Eventually she would be friends with him.

She could feel it.


	3. Chapter 2

At lunch time, Equius sat at his usual spot; alone and near the corner. He didn’t want to associate with others at this time. This was his time to get his nutrients. Besides, the others usually ate dishes of meats, the smell and looks of which made him sick. Why couldn’t they all learn that vegetables made you STRONG?

Nepeta looked around the room. There had to be a place to sit. Maybe with that girl with the red glasses? No, her table looked full. In fact, almost all the tables looked full. There was one with just one kid sitting there. Maybe he needed a friend? She decided to give it a try.

“What do you think you are doing?!”

Nepeta had just sat down and the boy seemed angry. “I’m sorry. Did I do something wrong?”

“You sure did. Everyone knows that seat is saved for my woman, Fef.” This boy seemed a bit pompous..but Nepeta had to admit, he was fashionable. His blonde hair was standing up and had an odd purple streak in it. His ears had a couple piercings that seemed to match his rings. For some reason, he wore a cape and a scarf indoors, even though it was quite warm. The teen stared at her through his glasses.

“Oh! I’m sorry. See, I’m new here and..sorry.” Nepeta looked away. She should’ve asked before sitting somewhere random. When she looked back to him, the boy’s expression eased.

“New?” The guy asked. He then smiled and bowed a bit. “Excuse me for being so rude. My name is Eridan Ampora. And who might you be, you lovely lady?” He gave her a smile. Before she could speak, the sound of heels clicking the floor came closer.

“Ugh, Eridan! Don’t be so creepy.” A girl’s voice said as the owner of the voice sat beside Nepeta. She was very pretty. Her long black hair waved down her back. Her magenta glasses matched her shirt and the jewelry she wore. Before she could chew out Eridan more, she looked Nepeta over and smiled big. “OH! You must be the new girl! Hi!! My name’s Feferi Peixes. This is my best friend, Eridan Ampora. I’m so sorry if he was bothering you or being rude.” She turned her attention back to Eridan. “Did you call me your woman in front of her? Eridan, I’ve told you..”

Nepeta gathered her things and slipped off quietly. Feferi and Eridan didn’t seem to notice as they argued a bit over whose actions were more atrocious; Eridan’s for trying to hit on Nepeta, or Feferi’s for interrupting. Leijon looked around for another place to sit. Her eyes settled on a table with one person at it. 

Equius. 

Zahhak was eating his salad, lost in thought. He was tempted to pull out a paper from his jacket when he heard a tray hit his table. He snapped his head up and saw her standing there. The same girl who sat next to him in class. Didn’t she learn by now he wanted to be alone? “What do you want?” He asked her, looking down at his food.

“Is it okay to sit here?” She asked. “I tried to sit next to someone named Eridan but…” She winced a little bit. “Yeah…”.

Equius looked at her, then to the seat and nodded. Anyone who had to deal with Ampora without knowing how much of a horny hipster he was had suffered enough. The girl smiled as she sat down. He kept to himself and avoided eye contact. She seemed to get the message; she flipped down her sunglasses from her forehead and focused on the food in front of her. Meat. The smell got to Equius as he tried to hold in his gags. How could she eat something so..horrid? Sure, he had eaten meat in the past, but now the very thought of that greasy mess made him want to give up food all together.

Nepeta didn’t notice Equius’ discomfort. She was starving. She dug into her meat meal rapidly. Whatever meat this was, it was delicious. Then again, all meat was delicious to her.

Equius watched in horror as the small girl murdered her meal. She was like a barbarian. A small, female barbarian. Where was she putting all this food? How could she eat so fast? How could she..

“Excuse me…” He groaned, holding his mouth as he raced out of the lunchroom, knocking down a student named Tavros Nitram by accident. Nepeta looked up from her now destroyed lunch and ran over to help the boy. 

“You okay?” She asked him. The boy looked at her and nodded. He had a slight Hispanic look to him. His hair was dark and all shaved except for a wide strip down the middle. His leather jacket was splotched with the lunch that started on his tray. The girl helped him clean off what they could and got him off of the floor. 

Tavros looked away nervously. “Uh..Yeah, I'm alright.” He took off his jacket to reveal pads strapped to his arm. "It happens all the time. I've learned to wear pads to soften the blows.” The boy rubbed his arm a bit. “Still get bruises, though.”

Nepeta looked to the doors Equius had ran out of. “I hope he’s okay.”


	4. Chapter 3

After school, Equius didn’t go home right away. He went to his usual spot on the school roof, overlooking the sea of teenagers flowing out of the school. He pulled out a paper from his pocket and just stared at it for a while. It was an old picture. But apart from the creases from folding and unfolding, Equius made sure to keep it clean. She had given this to him years ago. He took off his hat and held it close. One day he would find her. He would search the ends of the Earth for this girl. They were just kids when she left, but this girl was the only thing that made him forget all the bad things. Would she remember him if they met?

As Zahhak watched the crowd go by, he spotted Aradia and Sollux walking out together. They had been dating since middle school, and were still going strong. He started to hate both of them then, and he still hated both of them now. Who was he kidding? He hated just about everyone at the school. He tolerated only a few, including Gamzee Makara and the Striders.

He looked around the roof. Even though he disliked being around his peers, he sometimes got lonely. He had his father and his older brother. But other than that, he never spent time with anyone his age nowadays. Who would want to be around him? He was big muscled and had a sweating problem. He didn’t want to try out for contact sports,since he was afraid he’d injure someone with his strength. He had no interest in most of the clubs at school either. He did find interest in the Robotics club, but he was afraid he’d get angry and take it out on their creations. 

He put his hat back on and folded up the paper, putting it in his pocket. As he got back to the ground, he saw Nepeta wandering around. Everyone else had gone home already. What was she still doing here? He hoped she hadn’t seen him and was waiting. Couldn’t she just leave him alone?

“What are you still doing here?” He asked. Nepeta jumped a bit and turned around quickly. She put her hand to her pocket, possibly to pull out pepper spray. She took a sigh of relief once she saw who was speaking to her.

“Oh, Equius..Hi.” She said. She looked around a little more. “Well, I missed the bus home, so I was looking to see if I could use a phone to call my sister or my mom. But…” She sighed. “I guess everyone left for the night.”

“Which direction is your house?”

Nepeta thought for a moment, then pointed to the west. _Great_ , Equius thought, _same direction as my house_. He was quiet for a moment, then spoke. “My house is that way, I can walk you home if you like.”

The girl’s eyes brightened. “Really?!” She asked, then looked puzzled. “What’s the catch?”

“Catch?”

“Yeah, like when I sat next to you in class. What’s the catch? Don’t get close to you? Don’t look at you? Erase my memory of where you live so I don’t stalk you?”

Equius blinked. This girl was pretty good with her comebacks. A bit irritating, but good. “Just..don’t tell anyone about this.” He said. “I don’t need the entire school talking about me walking home with a girl.”

Nepeta giggled as they walked. “That sounds so childish. You afraid I’ll give you cooties?” Equius didn’t respond and kept walking. He didn’t want people to think he had gone soft. He wanted his peers to fear him, know he wasn’t a force to be reckoned with. Sure, the hat he wore made him look weak, but the last thing students thought of when they heard “Equius Zahhak” now was the hat.

The new girl seemed to take an interest in his hat. She looked at it from time to time, wanting to ask about it. She figured she shouldn’t bother him about it. She had bothered him enough today and didn’t want her first day to consist of annoying someone away and being hit on by a hipster. In technicality, she wasn’t new to the town itself. She had lived her for a short time as a child. A lot had changed since. 

She wondered if he still lived here…

Nepeta figured she should ask Equius at least one question. “So uhm..who was that boy in class?” The boy gave her a strange look. 

“Which one?”

“Oh! Sorry. Uhm..the boy in the gray sweater. He sits next to the blind-”

“...That’s Karkat Vantas.” Equius said quietly. “He’s from a different country. He speaks our language quite well since he’s lived here most his life. But…” Vantas looked away. “He’s not the nicest guy to talk to.”

Karkat. Nepeta liked that name, especially since it had “kat” in it. She’d try talking to him tomorrow. Maybe Equius was over-exaggerating. Though she barely knew him, Nepeta could tell Equius didn’t like people. His opinions couldn’t stop her from making friends.

As they rounded the block corner, Nepeta stopped. “Here’s my house.” She said. Equius almost continued on. He wasn’t used to stopping at another house on his way home. _Great_ , Equius mentally sighed, _She lives down the road from me_. Equius turned to look at the house. It was a decent sized house with a nice exterior. He knew she had mentioned something about a sister and mom. Did she have a father too? It wasn’t his place to ask. After all, he only had a brother and father. His mother had left a long time ago. They kept in touch by letters and phone calls usually. Maybe she did have a father and he was working. Who knew?

“Thanks for walking with me.” Nepeta said, smiling at the tall boy, looking at him through her sunglasses.

Equius looked on. “Yeah, no problem. Just don’t tell anyone.” He turned away and started on to his home. Nepeta felt like talking to him again, but she held back. He seemed bothered by something. Plus, he didn’t seem to like her that much. Of course, they hardly knew one another, but Nepeta felt he automatically disliked her. 

She promised herself deep down she would break through his tough exterior and find the Equius that was hidden within.


	5. Chapter 4

When Equius got home, he found his older brother, Horuss. at the kitchen table. Horuss was too busy fiddling with a new invention to hear his brother come in. “Ahem.” Equius coughed. The older Zahhak snapped his head up quickly.

“Oh Equius, i didn’t hear you come in.” He sighed. “Dad’s out with his archery team. Aurthour went with him. How was school?” Before Equius opened his mouth, Horuss carried on. “Well, we have this new girl on campus today. Quite odd, I'd say. She mentioned having a sister. Her name's Meulin Leijon or something like that...The girl, not her younger sister."

Leijon. Nepeta must be the sister he mentioned. "She's in my grade." Equius said, looking in the direction of the new girl's house. "Her name's Nepeta. She' pretty odd too."

“Nepeta?” Horuss asked, looking off into space. “That name sounds familiar…” He shrugged. “Maybe Meulin mentioned her by name, I don’t know. Wasn't exactly paying attention. I think she was talking more to Kurloz...” As Equius went up the stairs to his room, Horuss yelled up to him. “I’m going out with Rufioh tonight, and Dad is going to the bar after practice. You’re on your own for dinner.”

Equius rolled his eyes. That was typical. He was alone once more while his dad went drinking and his brother did who knows what with his boyfriend. Equius had no problem with his brother being gay. The Nitrams were a pretty nice family. Sort of wimpy, but very nice. Rufioh was pretty douche-like. If the rumors he had heard were true, Horuss was Rufioh's "side guy" while he was dating Aradia's sister, Damara. He wasn'y sure which side to believe, but if his brother was happy, everything was fine. Though, it made it a bit awkward at school. Equius was in the same grade as Tavros, Rufioh’s younger brother. Almost the whole class knew about their brothers, but nobody said anything. Not after freshmen year, when Equius nearly sent Eridan through a wall for insulting his brother. 

Equius got to his room and threw his bookbag on the bed. He hung up his coat and hat carefully, not wanting to tear or crease anything. He stared at the hat for a long time, thinking back to when he started wearing it. He was so lost in thought, he didn’t hear Horuss come in. The older brother watched his younger brother look at the hat. He knew how much it meant to Equius.

That girl meant a lot to him.

_“Come on!” A little girl said as she grabbed his hand. The two were only four years old. The little boy looked unsure as his friend pulled him towards the jungle gym. He wanted to be brave for her but..the big jungle gym was pretty scary to him. He looked to her The girl was very brave. She had jumped off the swing from very high (he slowed himself down to stop), she went down the slide head first (even though it was very unsafe), and now she wanted to play on the jungle gym. The jungle gym was a danger zone for boo-boos to the boy. Monkey bars, slides, various entrances/exits. Why couldn’t they play in the sandbox?_

_When he came back to reality, his new friend had gone up without him and was looking down at him from the first floor. “Come on already!” She pleaded. “It’s no fun without you.” This made him smile. He was happy to have a friend like her around. He gulped and climbed up the stairs. Once he got there, his friend hugged him and meowed. She loved cats…_

“Thinking about her again?” Horuss asked, breaking Equius out of his flashback. Equius sat on his bed, not wanting to admit it. He knew his brother wouldn’t tease him about it. But, he hated to admit being weak. The older Zahhak sat next to him and put a hand on his shoulder. “You’ll see her again one day, I’m sure of it.” Horuss didn’t want to get his brother’s hopes up. He remembered that the girl’s family moved a lot, never staying in one place for too long. He couldn’t remember why they moved so often, or who he had heard it from. He vaguely remembered the little girl having an older brother. Or, was it a sister? Maybe he had heard from his dad? Who knew? It was years ago.

Horuss got up “Well, I have to go meet Rufioh.” Before he left, he looked to his brother. “Sure you’ll be here okay?” Equius only nodded. The older one decided not to bother anymore and closed the door behind him.


	6. Chapter 5

After some time, Equius ventured downstairs for dinner. He forgot for a moment that Aurthour, the family's butler, wouldn't be home to assist him in making his dinner-he always went with Equius and Horuss’s father to archery practice, then to the bar. Aurthour would help his dad with various things, then have to drive him home if he got too drunk. So, Horuss was right; Equius was alone for dinner.

Equius put a little butter in a pan and put assorted vegetables in. Bringing out a large pot of water, he boiled the water and put in a few packages of noodles. Meals were a bit hard in the Zahhak family-Equius was a strict vegetarian and refused to even touch meat, Horuss ate a mix as well, to keep his strength up for body building, and his father was quite a fan of meat products. The oldest Zahhak male respected his youngest child's refusal for meat, so there wasn't a huge stockpile in the house, but not a scant of it either. As he waited for everything to finish, Equius went back into thought of her.

_The two of them stood on the top of the jungle gym. What would they do first? The slide? The monkey bars? The boy worried. Did she want to try and jump off the top? No, she wasn’t that crazy! But, she could be if she tried hard enough._

_To his surprise, the little girl just sat, sticking her feet between the bars and let them dangle. She looked to her friend and smiled, wanting him to join her. He sat next to her and they just looked at all the other children playing. The two only knew each other for a couple weeks, but they acted like they’ve known one another since they were babies. Ever since she moved here they played together every day._

_The little girl looked sad. He couldn’t understand. One minute she was meowing and smiling, then..she was sad? “What’s wrong?” He asked her. “You look sad…”_

_His friend looked at him and forced a smile “I’m okay. Don’t worry about it.” She said._

_But he was worried. He wanted to cheer his friend up. He looked through the bars, suddenly smiling. “Wait here.” He said. He went down the slide (closing his eyes), and ran over to a grassy spot. From the jungle gym, he had seen a couple different flowers growing together. Dandelions, violets, and some flower his dad called corn-cockles. He picked a few of each then ran back to the jungle gym, being very careful not to break any._

_The little girl looked through the bars, still a bit sad. He tapped her on his shoulder. As she turned, he held the flowers, turning a bit red. “I uhm..thought these would make you happy. It’s okay if they don’t. I-” He was interrupted by the girl’s gasping of glee. She gently took the flowers and smelled them. She jumped up and hugged him tightly, smiling._

_“Thank you.” She said, still hugging him, “They’re wonderful. They make me happy.”_

_The boy smiled. He was happy he could make his friend smile. He just wanted to know why she was sad. Did someone throw a rock at her? Did he say something wrong? Was it that burning smell and sizzling sound?_

_Burning smell? Sizzling sound?_

“FIDDLESTICKS!”

Equius quickly turned off the stove. The noodles and water had boiled over and made a mess on the stove and floor. The vegetables shrunk and were one step away from well done. Equius sighed. His dinner wasn’t ruined, but he had a mess to clean up and a smell to get rid of. 

Zahhak figured the noodles boiled enough, a little more done than he liked, but better than nothing. He threw in some seasonings and mixed the near-blackened vegetables done. Maybe the burnt parts would give it some more flavor? Who knew.

When he sat down at the table with his bowl, he looked out the window to see if his dad and Aurthour were back yet. Or maybe even his brother would be home from his time with Rufioh. They weren’t. However, someone was near the front of the house. 

It was Aradia and Sollux.

“Fiddlesticks.” The boy groaned as he dimmed the lights and pulled down the shade. He didn’t want to see them or deal with them. He feared if the house showed any sign of life in it, the couple would be at his door, taunting him. This only happened a few times, but not recently. They stopped after his father found the two in the process of spray painting profanities on their garage. Equius knew his dad was intimidating, Aradia and Sollux learned that very quickly. However, what they didn't know was that he wouldn't harm anyone, no matter what they did. Unless it put one of his children in danger or harm.

He peeked through the blinds and saw they paid no attention to his house and continued on to wherever they were headed. Where were they going? He didn’t really care. Their business wasn’t his concern. Why was he even thinking about it?

As he rose the blinds, he did see one more person outside the house, just wandering around as if they were looking for something. Or maybe even someone

“Nepeta?”


	7. Chapter 6

The next day, everyone was back in the classroom. When Equius got to his seat, something caught his eye. There was a tape line on the desk, one side was labeled “Equius” on a blue sticky note, the other was labeled “Nepeta :33” on a green note. Zahhak let out an annoyed sigh. She didn’t have to take the line so seriously, joke or not. As he sat down, Nepeta came bouncing in and sat beside him once again. She had claimed this spot hers, much to Equius's annoyance. He wondered how long it would take before she complained about his sweating. 

Zahhak once again read ahead, so he tuned out the teacher as she droned on about what he already knew. He glanced around the room to see who else wasn’t fully focused. Dave Strider was busy drawing something in his notebook, probably those lewd comics..something about Sweetie Brian and Helpful Joe? No, that wasn't it. Whatever. Beside him, John Egbert was on his phone, possibly reviewing the latest Nicolas Cage movie or on the comedian's forums. Roxy Lalonde was stealing sips from a small water bottle. Roxy drank a lot, but she was smart about it when she was in school. He knew she was trying to kick her habit, the whole school knew. But, at this age it was hard. 

When the teacher’s back was turned, Equius heard a tapping on his desk. He glanced over and saw Nepeta using two of her fingers to “walk” her hand towards his side. She stopped at the line and said quietly, “The mighty empurress requests purrmission to cross the border to Equiadas. Equius rolled his eyes. This girl was childish and quite annoying. What kind of name was ‘Equiadas’? If he were a country, he’d have a more noble name like..why was he even thinking about it. Nepeta just smiled and withdrew her hand to write notes. 

At lunch, Equius sat in his usual spot with his usual lunch. The only thing out of place was the number of people at his table. Nepeta once again sat there. She was more sophisticated today with her eating. Lucky for Zahhak, the school’s lunch today was meatless.

Equius thought about his friend from long ago. _What if she likes meat?_ Equius wondered. _Should I start eating meat too? Or would she consider going vegetarian? Would it be rude to ask?_ The boy shook his head. He didn’t have to worry about this now. He probably wasn’t going to see this girl for a few more years. He had a plan to look for her. He didn’t care how much it costs or how long it took. He wanted to find her. She meant a lot to him. Not just because she was his first friend.

She had saved his life. 

“You okay?” Nepeta asked. Equius snapped out of thought and looked at the girl annoyed. He grunted something and looked down at his meal. She just shrugged it off and scribbled more in her book while she ate. Wasn’t her business. She had something else on her mind. Particularly, someone..actually more like a few someones.

After school, Equius once again walked home with Nepeta. She explained that she once again missed the bus. She may be new, but Zahhak concluded this girl was not very bright. She missed the bus twice now.He hoped she wasn’t paying attention to where he lived. Equius hated surprise guests, especially some annoying, cat-obsessed girl who wouldn’t leave him alone. Plus, those cat puns...oh those puns...

As they rounded the corner, Equius caught a glimpse of something. He turned his head to look at the nearby playground, Little children chased one another, went down the slide, and did whatever children did when they saw a playground. Zahhak smiled a bit. He used to play there all the time when he was young. He remembered how much fun it was from his small perspective. The slide was gigantic, the monkey bars were like dangling over the Grand Canyon, and the swings were like you were flying. The jungle gym had felt like a giant castle.

He remembered playing with her there.

“Equius?” A voice said, snapping him from his thoughts. Nepeta had once again had snapped him out of his loving memories, to be reminded of the cruel, dark world he grudgingly had to occupy.

“What?”

Nepeta looked at the ground a bit. “Sorry, I just uhm..wanted to say...thanks for being so nice to me.” She smiled a bit as she went inside her house.

Equius stood there for a bit. Was he really being nice? Should he stop? He figured he shouldn’t act cold to her. She hadn’t done anything to him yet. He kept walking until he reached his house. He stopped for a moment on the stoop and turned to the new girl’s house. There was something about her. What was it? Was it her scar? Was it the way she talked?

Zahhak had to admit...she was kinda cute.


	8. Chapter 7

After a couple weeks went by, it was pretty obvious to Equius that Nepeta was not on any sort of bus route. She walked to and from school each day. Why she was at the school after hours and claimed she rode a bus was beyond him, not like he cared or anything. He had to put up with her for some of his class periods, lunch, and after school walking home. Equius really didn’t want a whole lot to do with her. He did think she was a bit cute, but she just sort of.. pushed her way into his life. He wasn't sure if he wanted to fully welcome her in and start any kind of friendship or beyond that. He didn’t want this to turn into another Aradia incident. He didn’t want a repeat of what happened the night of that event. Granted, Aradia wasn't exactly a "friend" at that time, but still. He had a very hard time trusting his peers. 

Nepeta asked a couple times about his hat and his trenchcoat. But, it was just the usual things he heard like “Why do you wear that?” and “Do you wash them?”. Of course he would wash them! From a very young age, Horuss and Equius were taught the value of good hygiene and proper bodily care. This worked semi-well for Equius, considering he had an abnormal sweating problem. His laundry mainly consisted of many towels and tank-tops from his workouts. He was slightly embarrassed to tell her that he had crafted the hat when he was little, reminding him of his very first friend, and the trenchcoat was made later for similar reasons. He felt like when he wore them, she was still near him. The only classmate of his that knew his reasoning was Kanaya. She had been the one to help him make the hat and trenchcoat. It was her older sister's idea to make the hat loosely fit when he was young, saying he'd grow into it, if he planned on wearing it for long time, to which his younger self's response was "I'm going to wear it forever and give it to her when we meet again!"

Equius was not really part of Nepeta’s concerns though. She did want to find out more about him and why his exterior was so hard and cold. She was going to break through at one point and find what his inner self was like. But, her main focus was on another boy in her class. One that always seemed grumpy like Equius, but was a charming kind of grumpy-Karkat Vantas. Something about him just brought out a spark in her. Was it his messy hair? Was it the way he always looked so tough yet stayed so quiet? What could she do to get him to notice her? She was willing to do near anything to get him to consider her as something. All she usually got was a glance toward her way and a nod to imply "hey" passing in the hallways. But, she craved a conversation, a friendship-turned-relationship. Anything to know he knew that she was worth more than a glance and a nod. She leaned against her locker and thought for a while.

What if he was the one she had been hoping for? She played with a boy who was usually quiet when she was little. Her first friend-no, best friend-in child terms. She was very sad when her mother told her they’d be leaving, again. Her mother traveled a lot to speak of this guy’s teachings. Many referred to him as “Signless”, since his semi-religious teachings fell under no religious symbol. It wasn’t 'there is a higher-being' based, but didn’t fall under 'there is no higher being' terms either. There really was no religion in his teachings, just spoke of ways to try and get along with your fellow human, putting differences like color, class, religion, and other factors aside. Her mother took a deep interest in this 'Signless'-she was practically in love with him! Unlike Nepeta's predicament, however, it was obvious the leader reciprocated her feelings and was happy she traveled all over to spread his word. Nepeta didn't understand why he just didn't travel all over. Granted, she learned from her sister he used to travel, but settled into the town after his wife had died. He didn't want his sons to have the burden of constantly moving and the loss of their mother. But still. 

Come to think of it, Karkat looked a LOT like Signless. Could he..?

“Hey, Neppy isn’t it?”

Nepeta snapped out of thought and turned to the voice behind her. Vriska Serket. “Uhm, it’s Nepeta actually.” The girl corrected.

“Whatever.” Vriska rolled her eyes. “Listen Neppy, word is you have your eyes on Karkat Vantas.” She smirked “Poor thing, he doesn’t know you’re alive, does he?”

Nepeta turned a shade of red. If she took her sunglasses off, Vriska would’ve be able to see the fear in her eyes. “What?! No. I- I don’t like Karkat.. I don’t know him that well.” She tried her best to hide the truth. Vriska pried deeper into the new girl's thoughts.

“Look, Neppy. I know a sure way for him to notice you.” The Serket had a devious plan. “Who do you see Karkat hanging out with usually?”

“Let’s see… Terezi and John and Dave…” Nepeta thought. “Sometimes Gamzee too. But what does that-”

“What do they all have in common?” Vriska interrupted. “Think about physical appearance. They're all different personality wise, sure. But there's a kind of..outer appearance that Karkat immediately sees.."

The Leijon girl thought. Terezi was blind, unlike the others, 3 of them wore some type of eyewear, like her. Only thing she thought of was…

“Short hair.” Vriska said after a moment. “And you?” She took a lock of Nepeta’s hair into her hand and played with it a bit. “You have such long hair...Karkat pretty much thinks long hair is a turn off.” She let go of the lock and smiled. “If you want him to notice you, or even consider you to be “girlfriend” material..well, you know what to do.”

Nepeta slowly took a hold of some of her hair. Her mother and sister had very long hair, just like her. She wouldn’t dare cut it! The only time her hair was considered “short” was when she was little, well, it was short compared to her family's length. Maybe, if she cut it, Karkat would talk to her, and realize their past together. Even if it wasn’t him, she wanted some type of relationship with him. She had never stayed in one place long enough to form a relationship like this. If she were to move, they could always keep in touch and try to make plans to visit each other.

“Thanks Vriska.” Nepeta smiled as the last bell rang. Vriska nodded and walked off. For Vriska Serket, the school was like a chessboard. She was like the hand to manipulate the pieces to move where she pleased, but never caring who was taken out in the process. She could make her pieces betray one another and turn on the other. But at the same time, she was also the queen-the most important piece on the field and moved where she pleased. Even when she was able to be taken down, she knew her knights would be there to defend her, the pawns sacrificing themselves for her benefit. Some of her pawns, like Zahhak grew aware of her manipulation and quit the game. But it didn't matter to her. When one left, another soon took their place, and the game continued. 

And now another pawn was entering into her game. 

On the walk home, Equius noticed Nepeta had a bit of “pep in her step.” She kept playing with her hair, putting it between her fingers and rising her hand up. She’d get to a certain length, frown, and then restart. What was going on in her head? He shook it off and kept walking. This was also one of their quieter walks...He did enjoy her talking though. Made it feel less lonely. He enjoyed his quiet time, sure. But ever since Nepeta moved in, walks got more interesting.

Later that night, Nepeta sat in the upstairs bathroom near her room. Her mother was off to a sermon and Meulin was off with some friends. She was alone. She took in a breath, let it out with a sigh, then stood. She faced the mirror and looked at herself. Without breaking the stare at her reflection, she reached for the sink drawer and opened it up. 

The girl removed a pair of scissors from the drawer and slowly got to work.


	9. Chapter 8

The next morning, Equius came into class to find Nepeta had not beat him to their desks first. Could she be running late? Maybe she _had_ beat him, but left to go do something. He took his seat and looked over to her side, expecting some little doodle or drawing, which had become her morning ritual; Beat him to class and annoy him by vandalizing the desks with childish drawings or litter with paper drawings. To his surprise- the desk had no new drawings. He looked in the pocket of each side; nothing new. This puzzled him. Maybe she was ill? No, he was positive he saw her today. Sometimes they’d walk to school together. They hadn’t this morning though. Why was he even worrying about it? It be nice to have a quiet day to himself again. He hadn’t really had one since she moved in.

Except it wasn’t a nice day.

By lunchtime, Equius was starting to get worried, even though he wasn’t sure why. More than likely she was sick, but that still didn’t explain the girl that looked like her this morning. He searched the crowd of students. No sign of Leijon. Had he angered her? He backtracked his thoughts to the past few days. Their interactions were the same as always, maybe a bit more positive here and there, but for the most part, nothing had happened between them. He looked down at his salad. His appetite was sinking. He remembered she was messing with her hair the day before, but why would something like that cause her to be absent? Maybe she got hurt earlier and was sent home. Maybe worse.

“Hey uh...Equius.” A voice broke the middle of his worry. Equius snapped his head up to see Tavros standing across from him. The boy looked a little worried. “Any idea where Nepeta is? She was going to help me with this art project today at this period. But, uh...i haven’t seen her since this morning.”

“You saw her?!” Equius gasped. “Uhm.. I mean….you haven’t seen her since?” Tavros shook his head. Equius’s appetite was slowly turning to nausea. “When exactly did you last see her?”

“Well.. she was wearing this fuchsia hoodie. She asked me if I had seen Karkat.. He uh… usually is at Terezi’s locker to uh..you know, help her with her things to class. And well...she is his girlfriend and all.”

Equius’s thoughts raced along with his heart. It was obvious to him Nepeta had a big crush on Karkat, but was always too shy to say something. What if she finally worked up her courage today? Maybe that’s why she was so happy yesterday on the walk home? That's probably why she was messing with her hair- to figure out how to style it for a date that night. What if she found out the truth about Karkat? What if he was planning to trick her just like Aradia had tricked…

“Excuse me!” Equius said. He got up with a jolt, sending Tavros flying back as the Zahhak boy raced out of the room. He had to make sure Nepeta was okay.

He raced outside and looked all over, tempted to call out to her. What if someone heard him though? He wanted to race to her house and make sure she hadn’t...No, he couldn’t be truant. What would his father say? 

Equius stood still for a moment to collect his thoughts as he felt the wind. It was particularly STRONG today. He decided to head back up to his spot on the roof again. Maybe that would calm him down and bring his appetite back. It was breaking tradition of being there only before and after school. This was a special case.

As he climbed up the ladder, he heard an unfamiliar noise. Birds? No. Cats? Nah. Another person? Most likely. Who else knew about his spot though? Was this secretly some place where aroused teens went with their significant other to..? Gross. Lewd...Not likely. The sounds were not of pleasure, but almost...sorrow, like someone was crying. Equius climbed a bit faster, ready to confront the intruder. Well, technically HE was an intruder too, but that didn’t give this person the right to-

“Nepeta?!”

The voice made the small girl jump a bit as she turned a bit towards him. Her face looked wet and red, as if she rubbed at it. Through the girl’s sunglasses, he could see her green eyes were complemented by the puffy redness around them. This took Equius back a few years. His first time up here. He was heartbroken, he was angry, he felt betrayed...What if Nepeta was here for those reasons? Maybe whatever happened with Karkat ended in agony.

“Nepeta, what are you doing up here? I was- I mean… Tavros was asking me where you were. He seemed worried.” Equius said, trying to cover up his own worry. His reputation as the silent STRONG guy would be impacted if word got out he actually cared for someone, much less a girl. 

“Why does it matter?” She asked, her voice was a bit harsh. “Do you own this place?” His stunned silence looked like the answer she was looking for. “Thought so.” She said, turning back away from him. She fought hard to keep the tears from showing. She gripped onto her jacket so the wind wouldn’t blow her hood down. She refused to let him see what was under the hood. She refused!

Nobody was to see the mistake she had made. Not again.

She could sense Equius behind her. What was he doing? He hesitated for a moment, but placed a hand on her shoulder. “Nepeta, Tavros told me you went to speak to Karkat today.. Did you find out...I mean… did you overhear..?”

Nepeta spoke quietly. “You don’t get it..” Equius could see her holding the jacket near the neckline. She was hiding something. Wait. Yesterday. Her putting her hair between her fingers, going up and down. Had she..?

“Nepeta..Let me see your hair..Please.” Zahhak said as he sat beside her. She looked at him with sad eyes. He was going to laugh at her. She knew it. She was going to be a laughingstock for the rest of her high school life. Maybe it would carry over to college. But, she could see the worry in his eyes. Was he actually concerned for her? Nepeta studied him for a second. His complexion was a bit darker than hers, his hair was jet black, and his eyes were..blue? She hadn’t noticed before. But, she couldn’t hide this forever. Nepeta took in a breath and let the wind blow her hood down. Equius took a sharp breath in.

Her once long, caramel hair had now become short and choppy. A few cowlicks stood from her head.

What had she done to herself?

Before Equius could ask, Nepeta covered it quickly and turned away. He was going to ridicule her for her stupid idea. She knew she couldn’t cut hair, she had NEVER cut her hair before. Yeah, once or twice when she was little. And that was the thing! Her attempt looked so juvenile! He would call her child, not speak to her anymore, refuse to be seen with her, he was going to…

Equius finally spoke. “Is this why you’re up here?” He asked. “Not because of Vantas?”

Nepeta looked at him from the corner of her eye. “Not entirely.” She said.

_Earlier that morning, Nepeta was thrilled. Her hair was now short, and she was sure Karkat would take notice, maybe even realize they had a past together as childhood friends! She kept her hood on tight, she wanted him to be the first one to see her new look. Nepeta could already imagine his reaction; first stunned, then look at her top to bottom, then bottom to top. He would start a conversation with her, find out this was the girl he played with all those years ago. He’d ask her to lunch, then to dinner, then an actual date, become her boyfriend, live happily ever after. The End!_

_After finding out where he was from Tavros, Nepeta bounced up to him. “Hi Karkat!” She said. He looked at her. “Oh hey uhm...Nepeta isn’t it?” She nodded. “Yes!!” She put her hands to her hood. “I wanted you to be the first to see something!” She said to him._

_Karkat looked confused. “Why me?” He asked. Nepeta responded with a “you’ll see!” She closed her eyes and mentally counted to three. When she hit the magic number, she flipped her hood down, feeling a cold breeze of air on her neck. She opened her eyes to see.._

_Well, he was stunned alright. “Whoa uhm..nice job?” He said a bit nervously. Before she had a chance to speak, a pair of hands slid across him from behind. “Guessss who!!” A raspy-like voice said. The two looked to see Terezi there smiling. Karkat finally smiled and kissed Terezi’s cheek.” Hey Terezi” He said with a smile. “I was waiting for ya.” Nepeta’s heart began to shatter upon seeing the couple’s interaction._

_Terezi sensed another presence around them. She took in a quick smell. A slight sugary smell mixed with some mint. “Hey Nepeta!” Pyrope smiled. “What’re you doing around here? Did you get a locker next to us?”_

_“Oh uhm..no Terezi. I was just...nevermind.I’ll..see you two at class.” She watched as the couple left for first period. How could she have been so stupid? She should’ve known Karkat would already have girlfriend. Look at him! What girl wouldn't want to be with a guy like Karkat Vantas?_

_The broken girl’s thoughts were interrupted by Vriska. “Such a shame, Neppy.” Serket said in a fake empathetic tone. “It must have slipped my mind that Karkat was taken...Foolish of me to forget he was dating one of my BEST friends.” Vriska started to walk off, then turned back a bit. “By the way, I do miss your long hair already. Suits you a lot better than that messy, choppy hair.” The girl flashed a smirking smile and turned away, walking to her first class. Her plan worked. Nepeta had actually believed her! What a fool! This was going to be a fun year for Serket._

“So I came up here.” Nepeta finished. “I couldn’t bear to spend the day in there..seeing them..seeing Vriska..being around anyone.” She looked to the ground below. “I’m such an idiot to have believed her. To think Karkat would like me because of a haircut!” Just for a moment, Equius saw Nepeta as who he was four years ago; fallen for a trick, up on the roof blaming themself for what had happened. 

He reached up to his hat, hesitating for a moment. Did he want to do this? He didn't want to see her suffer, but then again, he had never done something like this to anyone.

“Here.” 

Nepeta looked toward the boy. His hat was missing, making his long hair blow wildly in the wind. Instead, the blue cat hat he wore was in his hand, extended to her. “You can wear it until your hair grows back..Or, you find something to do with it.” 

The girl blinked and looked at him, a bit surprised and suspicious of his unorthodox gesture. “No no it’s fine… i have hats at home I can wear, honest.” This was sort of true. The only hats she had at home were winter caps. Good for winter or times like this… sweating hot indoors and summertime. Speaking of sweat…

“Don’t worry. I just washed it.” Equius said with a small smile, “Besides, winter caps would be bad for this season.. And baseball caps are..not very feminine.”

Okay, who was he to tell her she wouldn’t be feminine? The guy wore a blue cat hat. Olive green trench coat, and ate salads. If it wasn’t for his working out, and those...muscles…

Her thoughts snapped back. “I...thank you.” She took the blue hat and looked at it in her hands. For some reason, this took her back to when she was a child. Of course, she never owned a hat like this before. It looked as if Equius had made the hat himself-Careful stitching, a few little messups here and there- maybe he had some help from that really creative girl in class.. Candy?..Kiana? No, Kanaya! 

She put the hat on under her hood to avoid him seeing the mess. She flipped her hood down and looked over at Equius. "Does it look okay? It's pretty comfortable" she said, smiling at him.

His hat matched her fake tail quite well, in his opinion. Her hair didn't actually look bad like that. In fact, it made her kind of cute.

"You look great."


End file.
